If it hurts us over and over again. 

If we know its gonna be a bad ending.

If the other party doesn't feel the same way.

If we know that both of us aren't gonna last long.

If we know that we're not right for each other.

If you fear that you'll be left alone.

Do you continue loving the guy if he cheated on you?

Some would say yes, some would say no.

As for me... I still do.

No matter what, i feel somehow lost without you.

You already had hurted me so bad. You promised me you wont do it again. I trusted you and gave you another chance. But im scared. Scared that you're gonna do the same mistakes like what you did. Sometimes you even tell me what you want to do with a hot girl you saw. I appreciate your honesty but... it just hurts so bad. When you call other girls hot, it feels like a cut run though my heart. Sometimes you would say " just kidding " but how could i be so sure that you're kidding ?  you could be making up excuses so i wouldn't get hurt. :/

I feel like I'm the only one keeping this relationship going. I never stay up till 1 or 2 just to chat with  someone after they finished their dota. I never answered phone calls when im mad at people. I never keep on texting if someone didnt reply me.  But i did all of that. Because. Of. You.

I'm really sick of what we're having here. What are we? boyfriend girlfriend? playmates? friends? strangers? 

Yes, we were playmates before but didnt we took it to the next level? relationships? you still act like we're not together. I want you to prove it to me that what you said was real and you mean it. you dont know how deep is my love for you. Even though i dont act like i care , i really do.  You're just too stupid to notice it. Plus i always make the first move? you dont text me mornings and goodnights like you used to. you dont text me when you're bored. you don't call me and talk till sunrise. ( okay maybe you do sometimes , but not always)

BUT if i didnt make the first move. We could seriously dont talk for a day. You dont know how many people had been disappointed and mad and even scolded at me after they knew we were together. but i just kept it all inside. because i know, that me and you are none of their business. they can say what they want and do what they want but i dont really care. People told me that you're a player. You even admitted that so why do i still feel scared that I'll get played? :/ Maybe i thought that you would be serious for a change. 

Now..  i feel like you're getting tired of me. i dont know why. i just do.

am i that boring to you? :/

i just hoped that you're feeling the same way as im feeling now.